JEEP THROAT EXPOSED, NORTHGATE TAPES LINKED TO DOLPHINS!
July 21, 1997   

AUSTIN,TX (AP) -  Illusions founder Isaac Kishk unexpectedly went public
today with tapes allegedly related to the infamous "Northgate" scandal.
The tapes were furnished, along with a transcript, by "Jeep Throat,"
a mysterious informant known on the internet as Tsunami.  Kishk, owner
of the ill-fated machine "Jade," says he has heard the tapes and that
the transcript "IS legit."

Self-appointed authorities in the field of data forgery attempted to
discredit the new evidence, demanding digitized or analog samples of
the recordings for public review.  One expert in the chatline industry
explained that "the contents of the tapes are of no value to those who
have not met the persons it implicates.  Only the people on the tape know
the truth about its origin."  Two individuals whose voices allegedly
appear on the tape have denied participating in the conversation and
related events in private interviews.

FBI Special Agent Fox Mulder speculates that the tapes were produced
by aliens.  In a special press conference held earlier this evening,
Mulder stated that he believes "..the aliens are [masquerading as]
dolphins."  Mulder continued to to relate that he linked the dolphins to
the unexplained mutations and eventual disappearance of two Sea World
trainers last month.  The owners of the popular San Antonio theme park
declined to comment on the incident, citing pending workers' compensation
litigation.