Hotel Rose-Hulman
12/19/1995
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Jerry Bolton, with inspiration from Bruce Calder, Brian Chase,
numerous other Rose students past and present, the benevolent
Mr. Wolfram and Mr. Jobs, and, of course, Carnegie Mellon University's
Andrew File System.
-----------------

In a dimly lit lab room---
Tangles in my hair,
The warm smell of exhaust fans
Rising up through the air,
Up ahead on the console---
I saw a flickering light.
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim;
I couldn't stop for the night.
As I looked to the doorway,
I heard the warning bell.
I was thinking to myself,
"Is this a nightmare or living hell?"
Then I took to the keyboard
And I hacked away.
There were voices in the corridor---
I thought I heard them say:

"Welcome to the Hotel Rose-Hulman!
Such a lovely place,
Such a deadly pace.

Plenty of gloom at the Hotel Rose-Hulman!
Any time of year
You can find it here."

My mind is definitely twisted,
I've got Mathematica blues.
I got a lot of homework here
That the NeXTs can't do.
How they swap out the kernel
To somewhere on the net,
Sometimes they remember
Most times they forget.
So I called up the admin
But all he did was whine,
He said, "These are the first computers here since '79."
And still those voices are calling from far away---
Taunting you in the middle of the night,
You can hear them say:

"Welcome to the Hotel Rose-Hulman!
Such a lovely place
Such a deadly pace

Give it all up at the Hotel Rose-Hulman!
There's no need to cry
When your brain just fries..."

Vent fans in the ceiling
Blowing cold as ice,
We are all just prisoners here
Of the BlaCK DeviCE.
In the Crapo dungeon
They wrestle with the beast.
They fight it with their tired minds
'Cos they can't admit defeat.
The last thing i remember
I was running for the door.
I had to find the passage back to the place i was before.
"Relax," said the daemon,
"We are programmed to recieve.
You can logout any time you like
but you can never leave."