A UNIX Wizard...

Sat 01 August 2009 by jillian
So, I heard "Pinball Wizard" on the radio the other day and it reminded me of a parody called "UNIX Wizard..."  While googling for the text for all of you, I also ran across this "UNIX Heirarchy," which explains the difference between mere mortals and sucessive progress towards enlightenment.

image1

Unix Wizard by Jamie Mason (jmason2@gpu.utcs.utoronto.ca) with additions by Wayne Throop (...!mcnc!aurgate!throop):

>Ever since I heard of Unix
>I've always had a ball,
>From SunOS to Minix
>I must have run 'em all
>But I ain't seen nothing like him
>On systems large or small
>That tired, squinting, blind kid
>Sure makes a mean sys call!
>
>He sits like a statue,
>Becomes part of the machine,
>Feeling all the limits,
>Knows what the signals mean
>Hacks by intuition
>His process never stalls,
>That tired, squinting blind kid
>Sure makes a mean sys call!
>
>He's a Unix Wizard,
>I just can't get the gist
>A Unix wizard's
>Got such a mental twist
>
>How do you think he does it?
>I don't know!
>What makes him so good?
>
>Ain't got no distractions
>Don't hear no beeps or bells
>Don't see no lights a flashin'
>Ignores his sense of smell
>Patches running kernels
>Dumps no core at all,
>That tired, squinting and blind kid
>Sure makes a mean sys call!
>
>I thought I was
>The process table king,
>But I just handed
>My root password to him.
>
>Even on my favorite boxen,
>His hacks can beat my best.
>The network leads him in,
>And he just does the rest.
>He's got crazy Finger servers
>Never will seg-fault...
>That tired, squinting blind kid
>Sure makes a mean sys call!